she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Did we literally take a cab across the street
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back