ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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