NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Randomize
