We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
