heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Randomize
