Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Terrible idea I love it
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize