Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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