Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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