Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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