He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
