i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
