I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
