I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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