No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
