So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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