garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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