So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
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