Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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