i just had sex bonerless
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
