I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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