I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
