if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
