So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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