I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
organizing the empties. That sober.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
