He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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