Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize