The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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