i can't believe i had my finger in that
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
