Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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