I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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