my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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