Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
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