riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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