I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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