I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit