maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
