CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
