I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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