so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize
