the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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