there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize