How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize