My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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