I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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