I heard we made out
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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