the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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