Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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