We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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