i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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