pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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